Friday, April 11, 2008

Our Watering Hole Brings All The Boys To The Yard

The second day we slept in till about 1 pm and we were woken up by our maid who ended up thinking we were crazy gringas for still sleeping. Hey! We were tired from the marathon the day before! We got up in a hurry, took an icy cold shower, and headed out for some food. Then it was off in search for the great waters!

We found the perfect spot off either sides of a beautiful dock. The water was a clear blue and green and the dock was far out enough for us to be able to lay out in bikinis without locals coming to watch us would think.

Suspect #1
This was a guy maybe in his 40's that had followed us from about a mile down the beach. He had stopp
ed us before and said he was from the US and tried to have a conversation. We figured out right away he was full of lies. He comes walking down the dock, strips down to his undies, slithers down the stairs, and comes right up to me. I say sarcastically, "Ha, well it looks like you found out where we were swimming." He replies "I sure did.....You like dirty jokes?" I throw out a fake laugh and he continues on about a joke that sounds as if it's about a blow job. The punch line was that it was actually about licking thread and putting it through an eye of a needle. His 16 yr old wife he brought along sat on the side laughing hysterically all while he was in arms distance from my face.

As he continues with 2 more nasty jokes that I couldn't understand because his accent was so strong, I search for Andrea who was quickly doing the back stroke out to sea. Thanks pal. I decided it was time to leave the scene fast.

Suspect #2
This next guys name I couldn't understand but his nickname was Ace and he was in his early 20's. He was friendly in a not AS creepy way. He jumped right on into the water with us and started the convo with "Man, you guys are some good swimmers!" He was also intrigued with our tiny goggles that didn't cover our noses and how they worked. He was nice company. We did things like doing different jumps off the dock and he showed us some areas with cool fish. But apparently he slipped a comment to Andrea in what he was "really" looking for (wink wink). This time it was her turn to sign off and do the walk away from the situation thing. He didn't get the hint and wanted us to go to some bars that night with him. We lied and said "Yep see ya there at 6:30"

Suspect #3
Again I can't remember this guys name but we called him "Hotel Boy". He was maybe in his younger 20's and worked at the hotel that owned the dock. He was completely innocent and every afternoon he would tell his boss that he was getting hot and needed to go for a swim. He'd come out to hang with us, take a dip, and then take a couple hours to sun nap. Could I get paid to do that? One thing he really wanted to take and show us are the giant crocodiles that you could hand feed whole chickens and were tame. Heck no man.

One evening we ran into him I noticed he had a large patch over the right side of his face. I asked "what happened??" He said "oh I just drank a whole bottle of rum and got high last night and took a walk over to this dock. Then I fell over the edge and went face first into a cement block. 6 stitches." Then he continues by pulling out a wad of crack and explained how he used it to numb the sore and that he hasn't used any for other reasons (b/c if he did he gets aggressive). He then asked us again if we wanted to go feed the crocodiles. Andrea and I looked at each other and took note of all the possible bad things that situation could turn into. I know mental pictures ran through my head! He started acting really strange so we slipped away on our bikes leaving him with his wad of crack, bleeding face, and the urge to feed us to the crocodiles.

Who knew the freaks come out during the day?

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